To Be Secretly Gay & Spiritual


For those of you who are reading this probably have been following and supporting me for years but for those of you who are new, I want to personally say thank you. I felt compelled to speak on a topic that I rarely speak about. That is our sexuality and our preferences. Often so many people are living double life's and it's very scary for them to come out. I remember coming out as gay around 18 years old and it was the most painful experience because I didn't know the outcome. I came from a strict Catholic background and didn't know what to expect and the fact that I knew once I came out, I could never turn back. I compare this to jumping out of an airplane and although you have a parachute on your back and you know where the string is to pull, it's quite terrifying to do it. Because you start playing so many scenarios playing in your mind. I decided to write this because I have many clients who are lesbian, gay or bisexual and yes even transgender. I think it's beautiful that we live in such a way. What is harder is that even in 2001 it was a quite scary time. Not many gays had a voice or rights as we do now. Even now, many gays suffer being bullied, beaten or in worse case scenarios, killed. I can only imagine how things were before the 1990's for the LGBTQ community.

Whoever reads this and is questioning their sexuality, know it’s okay. It's okay to be afraid and it's okay to explore different facets of yourself. You are not alone. I see and hear spirit say that there is a direct correlation between how awakened people are and the higher you are on your spiritual path the harder the lessons are. There are many "straight" men and women who are in the closet and have feelings but cannot express them for fear of being judged. More than you know, many married men are secretly tied to a relationship that is not making them happy but decide to sacrifice their happiness because it's easier to keep the lie going. Many are business professionals who wear uniforms daily and you would never know. The fear runs deep and what runs deeper is the fear of being labeled or shunned or perhaps losing out on clientele or business because let's face it, society as a whole is not accepting all the time. Even more so, if you grew up in a strictly religious family or have a religious background, you have the old teachings reverberating through your inner psyche. Studies have shown that many youths have committed suicide because they came from a super religious family who did not accept them, or they were bullied to the point of losing control. This doesn't have to be your reality if you are struggling with who you are and know it's okay. We are all judged at some part of life. So how does this all tie into spirituality and our soul growth and journey. Well, those in the closet or who have not acknowledged who they are, create this stagnation that affects them physically, mentally and emotionally. Many who are not honest with their own self and identity begin to become unstable in their moods. It's a lower vibration when you cannot embrace what you really feel. Usually those who are in the closet or in a relationship but yet feel attraction or turned on by the same sex, will begin to become spiritually disconnected from their guides and angelic connection. See the thing that many do not understand is that the other side is not condemning us to hell like doctrine has imprinted in the souls and minds of many. The spirit world and GOD or God source does not care about your sexual preference because GOD is BOTH divine masculine and divine feminine. GOD is universal love and non-judgmental. It is we, the people here on earth who try to categorize people and label others. We create division and pain among other souls who only want to be free from the shackles of judgment. They want to go out and hold hands with who they love without receiving looks.

No one wants to be a dirty little secret either. Often many men and women alike who are in the closet or in a committed relationship with another but are unhappy, find themselves exploring their sexuality with the same sex but begin to use that person as their personal experiment. They begin to live out and get a taste of what could be, what feels right, but at the end of the day, the other person who is innocent may not even know that the person they are dating or having sexual rendezvous with is married or in a relationship with another person. The end result is that person develops an unhealthy attachment to someone who is not available and would not be willing to leave their partner behind because of various factors. So that person just played with the other's heart. More so, they have also created bad karmic debt for themselves. For those who believe in karma and have heard the words, "What goes around, comes around" is very true! It does exist and is the balance in the world. It's what balanced good from evil, light from dark.

You don't want karmic debt on your shoulders, and you don't want to keep repeating or hurting others. This is why it's so important to take it in baby steps until you are ready to come out should that day ever happen. It's not going to always have a happy ending or be pleasant. However, we are often our own worst enemies and stand in our own way to the road of happiness. Happiness exists for everyone. Ever heard that term "Everyone is a little gay" well the truth is that regardless of how much you deny it, straight people have wondered what it would feel like being with a gay person. Straight women have wondered what it would feel like or be like being with a lesbian. Gay people have wondered what it would be like being with a straight person. The curiosity or simple thought strikes more and more people than you know. Sometimes we see people with beautiful faces or bodies, and you get turned on or feel dirty because you felt something. That spark you felt could be simply curiosity or could be something more worth exploring.

As a spiritual person, we learn to accept everyone and not discriminate. It's so hard but it's just like being a psychic, healer, or even medium. We are going to face judgment. If you know someone who is struggling to come out, just be there for them as a friend and confidant. Encourage them to live their life as they wish. This journey in the physical world is the most difficult thing you will have to do. Exploring our sexuality goes hand in hand with our soul journey and sometimes when we explore, we begin to understand ourselves and others better. We make each other a little bit more human and a little more connected with our Oneness. Take your time, keep a journal or have a confidant you can speak with. When you are ready to fully let your wings fly, you will be grateful you took a brave step and that there are millions of people who share a similar journey as yourself. You will never be lonely.

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